Monday, November 03, 2003 |
contemplations |
While surfing and listening to Mandy Moore in the background, I'm trying to call the stuff that was called my life. A lot has happened in my 22 year, 11 months and 363 day existence. I try to recall everything significant that has happened and I have experienced. It's true what everyone says, that everything happens for a reason and what doesn't kills us makes us stronger. I've gone through so many changes in life that I can't recognize the person that I was almost 10 years ago, the time I entered high school and started my path to a constantly experimenting and changing life.
In high school, I started out as a "virgin", innocent, not knowing anything, a girl, no longer a kid, eager to test my boundaries. I'd like to think that I matured as a person in high school but I know I didn't. I may have had my priorities straight but the truth is, I was just there to have some fun. But it was in high school that I met my true friends. They are the people who know me inside out and who know what I'm thinking without me telling them. They are my friends for life and I will never let them go. We have gone through so much and will go through more.
In college, I was a siga. I wasn't a bully. I didn't bully people. But I came to college thinking I was better than most people. I experienced several reality checks. And I came out better than before. I came out more aware of everything that was going on around me. I came out more aware of what I want in life.
Right now, I don't know if I'm just babbling or just a little disturbed that I'm about to get older in around 24 hours. I know I'm still young. But I just feel that I still don't have direction in my life. There are so many things I still want to do but I'm scared that I might not get to do all of it.
But no. No worries. Because God is with me always. He will never leave me.
I'm going to try and write a book now. I might be able to get a publisher. I don't know what I'll include. Maybe I'll include this. Maybe not. |
posted by Jax @ 7:32:00 AM |
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