Jax Place
"For Our Feature Presentation"
Sunday, November 30, 2003
Ideally, Philippines
Today, November 30, is Bonifacio Day. Who remembers Andres Bonifacio? Some people are doing their best to have him declared as our national hero since he started the fight against the Spaniards and for the declaration of our independence as Filipinos. He was an indio who had a vision and sparked the flame that will pave the way for the independence of the Philippines from the clutches of Spain. He had a vision and he worked, he did everything to make that vision a reality.

To quote Paula Cole, where have all the cowboys gone? And in this case, where have the Filipinos gone? Is chivalry dead? As in this case, is patriotism dead? Have we forgotten our identities and what our heroes, what Bonifacio died for? Ninoy Aquino said the Filipinos were worth dying for. If he was still living today, would he still the say same thing?

I never like saying anything bad about Filipinos, about my countrymen. But you have to wonder sometimes: are they really worth dying for? When you die for them, are you really dying for a cause?

It's hard not to feel this way. All around you, people keep telling me they want to migrate to other countries because everything's already hopeless here. They want to give up because they feel like they've given their everything for and to the Philippines and its people. I honestly don't think they have. I know I haven't.

I don't like it that people have become too cynical, too "practical". They let go of their ideals because, according to them, they're not realistic. Who says they're not? The only way these ideals are not realistic are when you don't do anything about them. Our ideals are the things that should drive us to live our lives to the fullest. If we give up on them, then we give up living our lives.

People have recently been talking about the upcoming 2004 presidential elections. Every election time, there are posters, TVCs, etc. everywhere telling every voter to vote wisely. Vote wisely doesn't mean vote practically or vote the person you think will win instead of for the person who should win. Every vote makes a difference, yes. But only when that vote is done wisely. Otherwise, you're just wasting your vote. Some people know what I'm talking about.

Exercising your right to vote doesn't just mean vote for someone. It means, first and foremost, get to know the person, decide who to vote for, tell everyone why they should vote for that person and vote for that person.

I think what's wrong with Filipinos nowadays is that they forgot to think long-term. They only think short-term, what's good for everyone right now and not what's good for them in the long run. I may be judging people but I'm only telling it like it is. It just gets so frustrating when people refuse to be the person that they are capable of being and settle for the person that's easy to be. I mean, how hard is it to be true to yourself? Why do people always have to go with the flow? Why do people always have to do what other people are doing? Why do people only care about their image and, in the process, sacrifice their true selves? Why do people give importance to other people's approval rather than their own approval of themselves?

I am frustrated, yes. But no way am I giving up on my Filipinos. Everyday, I try to think of a way to make lives better for them. Whether it be in my own little way or with a really big plan. And to answer my early question, the Filipinos of today may not be worth dying for. But the Philippines is.


On to lighter things, I went to Greenbelt 3 last night to have a reunion dinner with my college friends. Ever since 2 good friends left last August, we've been having monthly reunions to make up for the lost time. Last night was no exception. This time, out of 40 people, 16 came. Not bad. Not bad at all.

We had dinner at Di Marks where we caught up with news about each other and other batchmates. It was like old times and we were all laughing like crazy. It was so good to see all of them! I haven't had this much fun for so long. Pretty soon, it was already 11:30 and we had to make way for other customers (as if there were any waiting). Some of the people had already left and the remaining 7 decided to seek refuge at Bizu Hay. It was so much like old times. I got to talk to Paul again and I didn't realize how much I missed talking to him about stuff. I haven't talked to him, and I mean talk, since we graduated from college. We stayed there for around two hours, until some of the people had to leave. Since Ekay, one of my favorite people, was going to hitch home with me, I asked her if it was okay to stay some more since I didn't want to go home yet. We met up again with Eileen and her boyfriend (they left to have dinner with a promise to catch up after) in front of Seattle's Best and talked. I kept looking at the different coffee shops in the hopes that we could stay there for awhile. The four of us talked for awhile and, because I still had to get up early Sunday morning, I forced myself to go home at 2am.

In the car, Ekay and I talked about life, our work and life in general with a promise to meet up again soon. I got home around 2:30 (the beauty of early morning traffic - there is none!) and was in such a high that I only was able to force myself to sleep an hour after I came home.

That's the kind of stuff life is all about. That's the kind of stuff you live for. In the end, you live your life for the people you love. Your life is not about what you do but how you do it and who you share it with. I've had lousy days but seeing them makes me feel so much better.


On a much more lighter note, Vic Zhou and Jerry Yan are in Manila! Well I don't know if they're still here but they arrived yesterday to perform in the 50th Anniversary concert of ABS-CBN last night. This afternoon, I was able to watch Sharon Cuneta's interview with vic Zhou and he was so cute! But not cute, like crush-cute. It was more like kid-cute because he behaved more like a kid. And he didn't know how to speak English although I am guessing he can understand English. But anyway, he was fun.


On a despicable note, however, guess how just went to the very top of my most annoying people list? Jon Dalton of Survivor: Pearl Islands. He convinced his best friend to go along with his story and try to make it appear that his grandmother died just so he can win the challenge. How despicable and low can a person get? It's just so unbelievable.


On a sad note, though, one of my very best friends, one of the few people who truly understood me and got me more than I do, is leaving. She was hired by Procter & Gamble to work for their office in Singapore. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, my most dear friend and my faith sister, Eileen, is leaving for Singapore in January. Tears are welling up in my eyes as I am typing this. I am so happy for her but I am just so sad that she's leaving. What's sad is that she won't be going there for sometime to be trained and go back here once it's over, no. When she leaves in January, she's leaving for good. She told me about this last night and I was so shocked, I couldn't speak and I stopped being my usual perky and happy self. I quickly texted our common friend, Den, in Australia and confided in her about this.

Hay. It's just so hard to accept sometimes that life is never certain. It's hard to accept growing up.


A couple of days ago, I learned from Steph that a certain girl, Camille, has died. I asked Steph and apparently Camille committed suicide. And I found out last night, she was a friend's cousin.

Another suicide. Why? What drives them to finally take their own lives? What drives them to say "I can't take this anymore. I'd rather be dead than deal with this"?

I wish I could have been there for them. I wish I could I have helped them. But I can't be there for every person. I can't be there for every person who feels this way.

But there is Someone who is.

God. God is always there for us. He is always there to help us. Call His name and He will be there. For you. Forever.
posted by Jax @ 5:54:00 AM  
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About Me

Name: Jax
Home: San Francisco, CA, United States
About Me:
See my complete profile
I am a freelance writer, editor and blogger.
I write from home and I write from the
coffee shop I manage. I am also a graduate
student at AAU, studying film.
I have never been more stressed in my life.
And I am loving it!
To know me and more about my writing services, drop me a line at
jtabergas [at] yahoo [dot] com.
Meanwhile, read some of my works here:
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  • Good Life Review
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